I wonder what makes relationships fail.
Is it the distance, the miscommunication, the gap sustained through commitment alone, love without treating the person well, or just the plain ole 'I'm sick of you'?
Sour relationships happen all the time.
People are rather constant even if they're the emotional type; You can't change overnight, the little subtle things you pick up and change is what's gradual. Therefore almost all human beings cease to be exciting after a while- They become boring, even annoying, to you.
The honeymoon periods are nice but afterwards there should have been something stronger, something stickier.
I guess what I'm saying is that distrusting people, distrusting the amount of faith you should put into relationships, and distrusting in idealism is a good thing.
Through distrust in this manner, you are cautious.
You don't give too much away, you don't rely as much.
You are, in a sense, independent.
You sustain yourself; your emotional well being does not sit on the shoulders of whom you're connecting with.
You have more time to choose who to open up to,
And there's a significantly lesser number of it.
It's not the closing of the heart out of fear of getting hurt. Rather, it is the act of being meticulous in the caring for one's own heart, of one's own secrets, however trivial.
Besides, you don't bore people as quickly that way.
This I am well aware is a pessimistic and narrow view, but it too can't be denied that hearts in general are fickle and our current age doesn't make us capable of holding up something this strong, however mature you are. Unless, that is, you are one of the few ancient people who are loyal to a fault.
Therefore perhaps it is better that we do not open up that easily, that we aren't open books, that we always have a dimension after another to be unfolded and gazed into.. Or not to be penetrated and only to be gazed upon.
Still, when conflicts happen the inevitable first thing that pops up in one's mind is probably the awe at how at ease these people are with each other, how willingly they show their ugly side, how easily flaws are unveiled and how it's almost always an instant insight into all the others concerned.
People get infatuated with one another, be it in the friendship or romance aspect. That then simmers down to a bland constancy, dulled by time and peppered with the ever so common revelations of characters. Once that's over, too, things escalate and people get sick of one another. What was once minute things disagreeable to one brews and rubs, it becomes an annoying trait to have, something to be 'changed', that one 'cannot stand', that one cannot appreciate and is always pissed off by.
Commitment or some invisible tie will still hold things together, tho.
However that doesn't mean anything other than an intertwining of fates: You are no longer fascinated by the other person, you want them to be both close by and distant enough so as to be liked all over again.
Sure relationships are sustained through effort, and you have to find a way to both be the one who doesn't tire of the other, and doesn't make yourself someone who's stagnant, predictable, and boring. Still, don't we all get boring at some point? Or is it that people in general don't have what it takes to do so, and that it is actually, possible?
I wonder: Is this pessimism, or is it true?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=zRHNi3QfFlE
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