A lil/lot about me...

I just really really love it when people understand the thoughts behind my actions, and appreciate it for what it is. Cuz trust me, most (most. I repeat, most) of my actions are thought through and so is the lack thereof.

Conversely, it breaks my heart when they mold and stretch the intentions I had into something ugly. I don't explain much, nor do I do it very well. 

I space out. I daydream. A lot. And sometimes I say things that make no sense, simply cause my brain has disconnected from my mouth and what appears in my head is different from what I'm communicating. When this happens, just understand what I'm trying to say/do and (hopefully, fingers crossed) you don't find it weird/stupid.

I really like it when people open up to me about their problems, or their values system.

Small talk is something I dislike but try really hard to do.

That's why, getting to know you personally is something really important to me. It's not mere socializing.

Truthful and genuine relationships are what I crave and as weird as that makes me, I ask 'how's life' wanting that from you. But of course, I rarely get what I seek.

I don't really show what I'm feeling half the time, and as exhausting as it may be for you, I need you to understand that I find it better to be alone with my emotions. 

I like watching movies alone just so I can sob loudly and cackle like a witch without being afraid of showing what's me. (And cuz talking during movies annoys me. I paid $7 for this. I want it to be worth it.)

However, when I watch movies with you it's probably cause I want to spend time with you to show you that I care. Or, it's an attempt at being an average teenager. Or, I really like you and wanna know everything about you (and perhaps catch you tearing up).

When I remain silent, it doesn't always mean I'm upset. I'm probably just off in my little world, or too tired or comfortable to make an effort in small talk. Or... I'm overly nervous due to your presence and don't want to embarrass myself further like I already have.

Large gatherings ain't my thing and 'I'm not free' means... Well. It can be purely that or that I find it meaningless to go out with acquaintances. If I do go, it's either that you are all special to me, or it's yet another try at being normal.

Honestly speaking, there's one superficial thing I like a lot on guys, and no, it's not abs or good looks or the such. It's something everyone can get, if they wanted to.
(Erm, please don't call it a fetish. I hope it isn't.)

I love dancing to songs. But I don't look that great. How do I put it... I'm extremely, extremely graceful. :)

I may really want to compliment you for, say, your ________  since the very first day I started finding you attractive, but it takes rehearsals in front of the mirror and no action to get it done. 

I may really like your hair, but all I can do is smile at you and hope that telepathically you get my message. 

I may really want to ask you stuffs and continue the conversation you started, but nerves make me cut it all off with a stupid lie and awkward grin... And hope for another chance. 

Oh, did I mention that I will be rehearsing in the shower the possible questions I could have asked, and the possible answers you could have given?

Sorry, I'm weird like that.