Friends that turn out to be fiends are why relationships end.
Yeah, well, I had to try that out at least once, however overused. :p
I suppose I should mention that she has been trying to become friends again, but it's with the manner that ignores everything wrong from the past we share, and the look that makes it seem like you're doing something bad to her.
It's okay, it doesn't matter anymore
Friends come and go; I need to learn this.
Surprisingly, I can make friends-
I just have to have that actual desire enough.
.
I shouted at the douche of the class today; I told him to think for others, and to quit disturbing us with his constant door slamming.
I suppose the details will only bore you, but yes- he wasn't capable of saying anything logical except for repeated 'what's your problem's and 'shut-up's in Hokkien, one of the dialects here.
Then I'd responded to one of those shut-ups with 'You can't say anything back/argue, that's why you ask for others to shut up!' and yeah he couldn't say anything back.
I then rounded it all off with 'do you have a brain?!' to which I was greeted with silence,
And we stared at each other for a couple of seconds before he finally backed off.
Aka.
“你说不过别人，所以你才叫人家安静
你有脑吗你！”
Loosely translating it here kinda makes it lose the tone I used, though.
One thing I wanna say,
Is that if you ever catch me using Mandarin like this,
Chances are you have pissed the hell out of me.
Like all other humans, that subconscious switch to your mother language is the clearest marker to losing control,
And I've only just realized now
but somehow I'm not the type to cuss when angered.
Not aloud, anyway.
Is that a good or bad thing?
Ugh, and I haven't shouted at anyone for six years now..
Even when the bish-of-the-group did all that I didn't ever shout,
Which makes it kind of dumb for someone worthless like that to get a rise out of me..
But still. There has always been a limiter to the amount of douchness that he exihibits on a daily basis- door slamming once or twice a day has become the norm, playing unwanted, loud music using the class projector is selfish but it is possible to block it out using earphones and concentration, and loads of other things like commenting on girls' underwear aloud or asking dumb questions for attention and not knowledge.
Thing is, I've simply ignored his existence for the entire year, and we didn't ever go head to head like this.
Today, however, it was five or six door slams over the course of, what, two minutes?
After playing music from the beginning of the day, too.
Hello sweetie, do you think you're creating music or something with that tempo and rhythm there?
Are you working out with that new found exercise of yours?
Initially I'd lowered my voice as with all agitated moments,
And it was 'Can you stop that? People are in here, you come in here, you slam the door, you disturb us. Terrify us, even.'
But logic is not to be used against someone like that,
And that was why I questioned his ownership of a brain because
Clearly, it's empty in there.
Oh, dear, I told you the details anyway.
But he insulted my mom. 'Terrify? Terrify your moooothher.' in that stereotypical manner that was more than enough for me to snap. I had gone 'wow', smiled, and told him that he had 'class' and for him to 'continue'- all in Mandarin.
And of course he couldn't say anything back except for the two phrases as aforementioned.
I can't believe people like that exist, I just can't.
You're seventeen, we're seventeen; how can we all be so egocentric, dumb, and immature?
I have wasted my breath on you, but it had to be done.
.
Oh no, me,
You do not dwell on this any longer.
We will finish that Lit guidebook by next week,
We will focus on Math for now.
Let it out, and let it go.
... Still, I can't believe I lost control; I'm usually good at keeping my voice in check even if my heart is thumping in the worst way possible.
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