Hums of floral fabric

I had one of the nicest days.

There is so much to be shared,
But, well, I'm just really happy right now.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=KkGVmN68ByU


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I am honestly at a loss when people so lavishly sprinkle me with compliments,
Because I'm not used to that- Never have, probably never will be.
And perhaps this is all that 'lack of confidence' thing going on,
But I really would just describe it as one of those 'I don't know how to react' moments.

Because they're beautiful, too,
And I love a lot about them-
It's just that I'm not social enough to state it aloud like that, and on such a frequent basis.

Cuz it wasn't the flattery that you hate but genuine compliments, generously aimed at you from a hose that has its opening pinched shut, thereby making it gush forward in full force.

And you know what, everyone's having fun aiming the hose at pretty much everyone else,
We're on a freshly mowed lawn, daisies swinging in the wind, flowy white dresses dancing to the hum of the whimsical fairies.
It's all so.. bright, and sweet.

Thing is,
My personality makes people assume different sides of me to be the whole of me,
And while I'm with them the quieter one, the girly side, and the crazier one pops up,
And when we had that light-hearted Christmas gift-exchange party thing today
I got fake jewel-ish things, a wand, a two-dollar version of the Titanic necklace, and pink fluffy socks- Stuff that supposedly reminds them of me.

Words can't describe how absolutely happy that makes me feel;
Since I have always, always wanted for people to not judge me for being honest about my vain side, for wanting to doll up sometimes and look good, for the ones who told me I was burly and brusque for my less-than-'feminine'-voice and everything else about me.. to stop commenting on how being a typical girl doing typical girly things is wrong, and that it doesn't fit me.

If you're a long term reader you'd know about this,
And I didn't mean for it to be repeated this much,
But it really does make me oh so satisfied, and happy.

I am accepted and welcomed for the different dimensions in me,
Just like everyone else. These new people aren't like the bad ones I've had before;
They won't tell me what I am and therefore what I should always be,
They won't jeer at me for just trying to be myself.

Of course people's opinions don't matter that much,
But most of us are sensitive humans who don't necessarily need verbal affirmation;
We just need you to stop being rude and mean and judgy about things.
Especially so, if you're gonna mock us for every action we take
And bring in the entire group to reinforce that joke that really isn't all that funny.

Honestly, that is all I've wanted.

And today I realised that my little dream has come true,
All without me realising it.

It's crazy, but they go beyond acceptance;
They aren't afraid to show appreciation, love, and warmth
And that's what I love so much about them.

Me,
I'm a little awkward and a little bulky,
And I compliment less but it always comes from the heart.

Side note: This gift exchange is always a culmination of jokes, whereby every gift is supposed to embody the recipient, or make a joke out of him.
Passive aggression earns a floral knife, someone gets a yellow trash can with the phrase 'I got you your home', someone adorable gets window-wiper glasses, and so on.
One thing I didn't expect tho
was how much they'd liked my jokes of giving the guy who cares a lot about hair- a book on Justin Bieber when he had the Bieber-hair, alongside a free bedroom poster of the guy in all his hair glory
Or the one about giving the girl who helps out sex workers and always talks about the topic maturely-  a collection of pictures on chickens named "Cocks" in bold print.

I probably killed all the humour by explaining that,
But hah.
There you go,
I'm not funny.

*whispers* I did get the MVP award for my gifts though. *cough* Please, include it in my resume.


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