I may have written too much.

I did it again...

I went full-saiyan mode over some ramble with my mom,
And I say 'with', but it's really just me shooting my mouth off like a machine gun over something I'm pretty passionate about. My mind fuzzes up with all the things I'd like to say, and I forget for a moment that I usually get my respite from talking with Mr Bear, my roommate. Then there's Maven, you know. And Floppy.

But obviously it's more fun talking to humans,

And I say 'talk' but it's simply a one-sided sharing session.

Basically what happens is this: I get some thought or whatever, and I just.. talk, with twice my usual speed, stop only to take breaths, and get legit sweaty over it because we talk in weird places (like in front of the air fryer while it's heating up food, for instance.) Then, I get short of breath and stare at my mom expectantly like 'how was that'?... only to be greeted with the most engaged facial expression in the world.

It's kinda bad huh.

I haven't really done that with as many people outside of family yet,
Because I can't, and I shouldn't,
But when I do... They usually just get this blank look on their faces like my mom does and I just remain overexcited regardless because I really want to talk about it!

Well, thus far I can only really afford to be this spoilt in front of my parents,
So that's kinda good in a way.

Still.
I have always hoped for someone to be able to get hyped up over talking about book exhibitions in the US, or book clubs there, or plain movie/book/drama reviews that threaten (I mean actually do so) to spill out of my brain as verbal diarrhoea while I enjoy most of it.

Mr Bear takes the brunt of the damage,
But really I've always hoped for my parents to have common topics and interests when it comes to the conversations we share, or for them to have something they have verbal diarrhoea over, too...so that I can learn something new every day from them, or for them to have different things to say after a week, or a month, and either have no basis for it or just substantiate it with deeper thinking or reading.

They are constant in that way, and that's one thing I love about them
But it's just been something I have wanted for quite a while now,
And it's something I rarely find in the friends I make, too.


Well, it is how it is and it is what it is,

My parents and the maternal side are the most beautiful-hearted in the world,
And growing up like that makes you believe that of the actual world too
So it both makes you simple-minded in that optimistic manner, and overly naïve
And while that too has brought me loads of troubles,
It too has formed the basis of who I am.

And I am always grateful for that.